Saturday, November 30, 2013

How to not be too Kind

Just because you are kind to someone does not mean that other people will be kind to you. Look into history and you will find out that a lot of decent and generous souls have been mistreated. So be kind while watching your back.

How Your Habits Affect You Personally

Don't make a habit of underestimating others. If you do so, you will unintentionally do the same to yourself. It is not easy to be one way to another without doing the same thing to yourself whether good or bad in the same way but another form.

How to Prepare for an Interview

When you speak don't be like a bubbling fountain. Don't just volunteer information that is unasked for. You will be judged by the measure of the words that you speak. Don't wait for an interview to be your best self. Make it your life and you will ace interviews.

Friday, November 29, 2013

The Tides of Life

Don't think that you got it all just because of who you are today. The tides of life change. They can even catch you and you can't always know on what side will you be tossed.

Finding your Sense of Self-worth

You have to know your self-worth before you make any kind of important decision. Don't go ahead making a decision because you think it will increase your self-worth. Your sense of self needs to be independent of outside temporary factors like money and people's opinions.

Don't Give Up

Don't give up because you think that you are too young, old, or unqualified. There are people in your position or in a worse position who are thriving. You need to believe in yourself just as you are and learn how to adapt to any arising challenges. Everybody has a different road to success and only you can find the way to your unique path.

The Toxicity of Gossip

Explore the lives of others if it motivates you to be a better person.  If you are into other's lives because it makes you feel better than them then you are wasting your time. Your brain stores up everything that you take in. If you feed it with people's trash then don't be surprised if one day you end up doing the same things that you looked down on.

The Peace-Maker vs The Fault-Finder

Don't waste your time bickering over anything and everything. It can be taken away from you just as quickly as it was given from you. Learn how to be a peace maker instead of a fault-finder.

How to have the Best Black Friday

It's Black Friday. Some people are out there looking for cheap deals. While others have decided to remain at home. This is the second Black Friday where I knew I didn't want to go. If you don't want to then don't go. You can have your own little shopping spree in your mind while thinking of ways to shop for the brightest ideas to use in  December and the upcoming year.

Is Truth Destructive or Constructive?

Everything is not black and white. The more that you search for the truth is the more that you will sometimes get confused. At a certain point, in the quest for the truth you have to settle with what you know so far and make peace with it. Truth wasn't meant to destroy anyone. It should be used as a redemptive and connective tool.

The Effects of Being Short-Sighted in Relationships

People change and so do you. Don't be short-sighted. The people you shun today could be the very same who you will need tomorrow.

Giving Away Money

Would you rather withhold money than give it? Do you do that sometimes just because you don't want to be a human bank or materialistic person? Well sometimes your money is all you can give.

Using the Present Well

Whatever you do today can and will impact your tomorrow. You need to understand yourself well enough and also the opportunities around you in order to know what you need to work on today.

Fearing Challenges

Fear and challenges are not the best of friends. If there is one message that needs to be heard early and often then that is it. Even if you have a fearful nature whenever challenges arise you need to abandon your former self and become brave.

Thursday, November 28, 2013

Being the Best You

Just because things aren't going well today doesn't mean they will stay that way. You might be the most despised and misunderstood person today but someone else tomorrow. Just trust God and focus on being the best you that you can be.

Avoiding the Selfishness Trap in Communication

Why is it always about you? Are you sure everyone wants to keep on hearing about what you got going on? Your life isn't a reality tv show. Take time to show interest in others lives instead. When communicating make it about them and their life and not you and yours. That's how you will know who is genuinely interested in you as a total person.

Stop Procrastinating

Don't put off things. It can and will cost you. You might think that everyone is slack just because they are silent. No they aren't. They are actually silently getting their lives in order while you are out and running your mouth.

Trusting God over Humans

Don't be too trusting. People you least expect can be the first ones to betray you. But don't be surprised. You need to learn to depend on God only and not humans. Humans are just his vessels.

Counting on People

Don't assume that someone is on your side just because they say that they are. Lip service is not enough. Watch someone's actions and then don't waste a single minute counting on someone who isn't meant to be of any help to you in that season. Everything has its season...including people.

Being Thankful for Your Losses

Don't just be grateful for what has been added to your life. There are also people and things that are no longer in your life. You should be thankful for that too because absence can spare you from sorrow.

Displaying Gratitude Now

It is sometimes easier to complain than to meditate on the good things we already have. Don't wait to experience adversity and then be grateful. Display gratitude now.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

What Are You Doing With Your Life?

Are you that kind of person who just enjoys celebrating when others succeed? Like you are so good at figuring out what great things have happened to those in your immediate circle or even celebrities like Kimye...mmm. What about you? What are you doing?  You are just so busy criticizing others. Well you might want to take a step back and start doing your thing and minimize being an unpaid critic lol.

The Danger of Anger

Sometimes it is easy to allow our anger to cloud our judgement. You can get so angry and bitter that it stops you from thinking. It can even blind you from your own mistakes. So be angry for a while but don't let it become the lens through which you see everything.

Happy Thanksgiving?

I'd like to wish everyone a  Happy Thanksgiving. At the same time, I apologize to all the Native Americans who are offended by this holiday as it carries memories of a hidden story of genocide.

The Little Things in Life

Sometimes we focus on the so called big things like money. Yeah it is important but it is not everything. Take a step back to focus on the so called little things in life like love.

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Don't Give Up

It's easier to give up than go on. Only the strong go the extra mile. Only the one who find the strength to go on when nothing is working.

Friday, November 22, 2013

Learning to Listen

People try to say things to us everyday. They don't only say things in words. They also use actions and gestures. Real listening involves seeking to understand the unspoken.

Hope for Tomorrow

You might think that there is nothing in store for you. Everyone will go through periods of despair at one time or another. The key is remembering to focus on what's the next step after you get up. There are rises and falls in life so look forward to where you are about to go. It may be hard but if you are determined and committed something will come up.

Falling in Love with Yourself

You aren't truly living until you accept yourself. You need to accept your strengths and your weaknesses. You need to fall in love with yourself so that you can love and accept others with a greater capacity.

Stopping versus Continuing in Error

Have you ever worked really hard only to find out you were wrong? It might be good sometimes for you to be clueless about that because if you knew you were wrong you might have never finished in the first place. It is sometimes better to have a complete version of something that needs revision that to end halfway while trying to do the right thing.

How to Overcome Writer's Block

Have you ever had a moment when you wanted to write but didn't know what to write? If you aren't in school then it won't maybe matter that much. For those of you in college, I bet you all know how challenging it can get especially when you have to write on something that you are uinterested. Here are three things to do:

  1. Write down the ideas that cross your mind as you might find a connection

  2. Do extra research beyond what is assigned in class in order to find an angle of interest

  3. Remind yourself that one of the signs of a good writer is someone who can write about something uninteresting and make it interesting

Money isn't Love

Money might seem like a substitute for a romantic or platonic friendship but it isn't. One is a heart and the other is a piece of a paper. Even with your friends you have to make sure that you aren't a paper friend or bank. You need to show and prove your friendship with acts of love...that don't even involve money sometimes.

Making Up and Breaking Up in Relationships

Your enemies of today might be your closest friends tomorrow. And, don't be a bit surprised if that opposite occurs. The earth goes round and round and so can your relationships.

The Fear of Education

Why don't you want to go to college? What made you think you can't do it? What is the worst case scenario if you go get an undergraduate degree, graduate degree or doctorate? You just have to be brave. You will never know what you are capable of academically unless you take a step of faith.

Challenges in Education

Education can open your eyes in ways that you never imagined. So why is the education system of some places structured in a way that students merely memorize to get by? And if you ask them in a week or year about something they know nothing. So how in the world can true learning be achieved? Since true learning should go hand in hand with a healthy sense of memory.

Running Away from Your Destiny

You can't run away from your destiny. You can explore other options but what you are meant to do will follow you. Or can you change it? If so how can you change your destiny?

The Ways Memories Influence Us

We sometimes only remember what we choose to remember. Some memories are out of our control while others are in our control. A storehouse of negative memories won't do you any good consciously, unconsciously, or sub-consciously. Make it your goal to fill your mind with positive memories that will remind you all of the good in the world and inspire you to do more.

The Danger of Anger

People get angry for many reasons. But there are those who choose to be angry everyday and everything they see is through the lens of anger. If you are looking for a reason to be angry then every little thing can make you angry. And it will eat up your physical and mental health. It's not costing anyone as much as you.

Happy Friday

Don't forget to take time to relax today. You are always going to have work. Won't you? Who wants to be a slave to their work? I don't know anyone like that yet. There is a difference between being hardworking and allowing work to dominate your life. Take a break and have fun this weekend!

To All My Pals

You all have those people who have been with you through the ins and outs of your life. They were with you when you were so happy that you could jump in the air. They were with you when you didn't want to do a thing. Don't forget them...don't take them for granted.  Appreciate a pal today.

Officially Bitten by the Travel Bug

Have you ever felt like travelling? It's that voice telling you that you have been in one place for too long. It's that longing to experience something different from all you've ever known. It's that yearning to be  a part of the global community and yeah you just officially got bit by the travel bug.

To the Mother working 5 Jobs

It's late at night. It's early in the morning. It's mid-afternoon. You don't even stop to take a break. You refuse to rest unless it's necessary. You think about your children, your parents, and everyone who needs you. The vision you have for them is what gives you every ounce of energy needed from your first job to the fifth job that you all get done in a week.

Thursday, November 21, 2013

Listening to our Children

Take time to listen to children. There is a lot that they can teach you about yourself and others. Listen to them also because they need you to do so. Not every child has the privilege of being in good hands so be an angel to all the children around you.

Running from Yourself

At the end of the day, you got yourself. You can try to run from yourself with all your might but it's a part that will be there. Don't try to change yourself to be what you aren't. Be brave enough to be an original you.

Fear as a Motivator

We all have our fears. There are not there to protect us. They are like our worst enemies as they hinder us from being all we can be. They also support the fallacy that life is perfect which it isn't, hence we might as well be brave and live it out in its fullness. So use your fears to motivate you to do what you are afraid to do.

The Importance of Discernment

Someone might have told you that you can't do it. It is wise to listen to the opinions of others and even more wiser to discern the reason behind their advice. So don't just throw advice outside the door until you are sure that you understand the message behind it.

The Price for Lying

Sometimes based on what's around you, you might choose to lie. The truth has a weird way of catching up with you. Try your best to live a truthful life as you don't want to carry the weight of lies your entire life.

Learning how to Love

Do you know someone who always like hating on others no matter what? It's a matter of perception. If you feed your soul on hatred that is all that will bring it content. If you wean your soul from negativity and feed it with the maturity of love then you will grow. 

Self-Jeopardization and you

You need to take time to understand who you are. Think about what makes you mad, sad, angry, happy, passionate and more. If you neglect the art of self-awareness you run the risk of jeopardizing your life by doing things that aren't you.

Using our Natural Strengths

Don't be afraid to do what you were born to do. There are things that we learn and others that we are natural at. Don't neglect your natural strengths and think they will blossom alone. You need to put in the work.

Seasons of Life

I love the book of Ecclesiastes. I don't know all of it but I love its theme of time. Whenever, I want to make sense of anything all I have to think about is timing. Everything has its own time and season so it doesn't matter what you are going through right now. If something is meant to change it will and if it is not then it will stay the same throughout the different seasons of life.

Relationships and Business

There are business transactions and there are other things like human relationships. Don't make your relationships a business where all you want to do is profit. You need to be willing to experience losses or to make big sacrifices in order to have a healthy relationship. There's no formula so just have to do what works for you and your significant other.

Friendship and other Things

Do people come to you just because of what you give them? Are they out to get your money, expertise, brains, or something? It's good to always be giving in honor of God but don't mistake that for friendship.

Guarding Your Heart

Some say there is a thin line between love and hate. While others say love is a form of madness. In light, of all that just remember that as much as you love to love you gotta guard your heart.

Seeking Perfection

When people act weird don't ignore it. People have reasons as to why they act the way they do. It's no use being in denial. At the end of the day, we have to accept the fact that no one including ourselves is perfect and work on improving ourselves and others.

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Thanks Everyone...This is my 501st Post

Thanks everyone for supporting my blog from day one. This is my 501st post and yes we will soon be in the thousands. Have an awesome morning, night, or evening!
Love,
Amor

To All the Classmates I've Ever Had

I may remember some of you. While sadly enough, some of you are not in my head. What made some of you remain edged in my memory even after many years? Why did I always think we would be together at-least sub-consciously? All I wonder is when will I see one or all of you ever again. And, if we don't ever meet thanks for being in my life even for a minute.

Don't Complain To Everyone

There are a lot of people who have had it worse than you. You might think that you have had all the trouble in the world but you haven't. Everybody has a different story you just need to take time to listen and earn their trust before you complain in their face.

How to be Happy Everyday

What makes you wake up? What makes you drained? Learn the difference between the two and focus on the former more than the latter. It's simple like that don't waste your time allowing misery to dominate your life.

Self- Accountability and You

Check yourself before you wreck yourself. Stay in your Lane. I heard someone say them and I thought Wow this is deep. We need to develop self-accountability.

The Power of Words

The words we say reveal what is within us whether you like it or not. You need to watch what you say. It's always easy to think that our words are meaningless. But sometimes the right words can be the difference between life and death.

Wasting Your Life

Don't waste your life doing what others say you ought to do in order to succeed. Live your life by your own rules. You don't want to find out that you were living a lie when it's too late. Only you can define what success means to you.

Respect for Life

Sometimes it's hard to respect life. If we had respect for life then we would stop doing what we aren't supposed to be doing and start doing what needs to be done. We need to stop taking others and ourselves for granted. You can't just assume that you will have a million chances to mess up.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Overcoming Your Fears

You might have been told all your life that you aren't good enough. And you keep hearing those voices even after so many victories. Don't run away from voices. Listen to them for a second and don't stop working hard to disprove those negative feelings. Just be persistent as you win a battle at a day. You are better than you think you are.

Seasons of Life

Mother nature has been teaching us for years that everything has its own time. Unfortunately, the children of nature do not always heed to her tender messages. One of her truths is that everything in life has a season. Yes, and that means special and non-special people will be in and out of your life for a season. It's not even optional.

The Price for Dreaming

A lot of things in life have a price. Basically life is a business. We buy and sell what we do, say, and do not say or do. If you have a dream there are things that you will gain a long the way and even lose. So remember that there is even a cost for dreaming.

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Colorism

Throughout different societies around the world there are those who might think they are better or worse than others because of their color. For one reason or another being dark is not always esteemed. That's just plain shallow. Everyone is beautiful regardless of the shade of their skin. 

Love and Listening

There is a lot that you might not know about those around you. Use your time wisely and learn about others. People need a listening ear and you don't have to always be on the receiving end. Let your love motivate you to give your full attention to those around you in words, thoughts, and actions.

Money, Happiness, and Love

Money is one of the major sources of conflicts in relationships. Sometimes it is about too much money and sometimes too little. You need to find ways to make sure that pieces of paper do not destroy priceless relationships. Money shouldn't determine the health of your relationship.

Giving without Money

They say money makes the world go round ...doesn't it? Yeah money can make certain people or things gravitate towards you. The sad thing is that some of those people won't be genuine. If you have money you have to learn to find ways to be loving that go beyond spending lavish amounts of money on someone to prove your love.

Loving Yourself

You need to love yourself enough to the extent that you can walk away from something that makes you less whole. It could be a job, a person, or anything. You need to take care of you like nobody else so you can have the strength and wisdom to help those around you.

Asking God for Help

Are you trying to break a bad habit? Don't run away from it. Find ways to learn why you do what you do or not do what you are supposed to do. And, seek a higher power too because you can't always do any and everything by yourself.

Learning to Love Yourself

What defines you? Is it your job, brains, or beauty? What if you lose all that? Who will you be? That's why it is important to love you for you from the bottom of your heart. Don't let people or things dictate your self-worth.

The Power of Forgiveness

Wouldn't you want someone to forgive if you really did something bad to them? I bet you would. But then again you have to remember that there are some people who will knowingly or unknowingly hurt you and you still have to forgive them. If you don't you are living in bondage even if it feels like freedom.

Friday, November 15, 2013

Definition of Friendship

What does a friend mean to you? It seems like an easy question but if you think further you will realize that it is much more complex. Sometimes you never know who your friends are until it's too late. Just keep an eye out for you and be a friend.

Watch Your Thoughts

What are you thinking about? Be careful because your thoughts can catch up with you. One day you will be surprised to find out that you are where  you are, because of how you responded to your negative and positive thoughts. Be wise and sharpen your discernment.

Battling Your Daily Fears

Have you ever thought you would never succeed at something? Don't let what you see and hear discourage you. Be brave and battle your fears daily.

The Dangers of Over-expecting

Have you ever felt like someone had to pay you back for what you did for them? It's human for us to expect certain things from those in our close circles but then again those very expectations can lead to much sadness and bitterness. Don't try to buy a relationship with your money, body, skills, or anything. Be yourself and those who love you will be there for you.

How to be Less Judgemental

Everyone has different perspectives on life. This is easily said than believed and practised. If we did believe it then we would stop judging other people. Prejudice and stereotypes about certain people and things can be subtle, but you have the choice everyday to decide that you will see things through the eyes of another even if you disagree with them. 

How to Accomplish Your Big Goals

Have you ever wanted to get done so badly that you never started? If that sounds like you then you are over ambitious and that's okay. You just have to know how to use your strong sense of achievement to actually get stuff done. Don't waste your time planning...begin to do something even if it is a bit at a time.

How to Manage your Time

How do people make time to do what they need to get done? There are many answers but one key thing is self-awareness. You  need to know yourself well enough in order to be able to do what you say or want to do at the time you planned to.

Monday, November 11, 2013

Don't Be Afraid

You don't have to always stay in your lane. Sometimes getting out of it will lead you on an adventurous journey that will transform your perceptions of everything including yourself. Don't be afraid to explore the unexplored and tread the untreaded.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

Hope Will Come If You Keep Searching

Sometimes you may feel like everyone and everything is against you. Learn to step back and remember how out similar rough times you emerged a victor. Panic won't take you anywhere but patience and determination can lead you to hope.

Preparing a Better Tomorrow

Sometimes all you want to do is nothing. Then and there you have to persist and do something. You have to find the energy to overcome the exhaustion of the present in order to have a victorious tomorrow.

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Remember who You are

Sometimes we lose focus of our identity and goals. You should want to learn more about yourself daily. Don't waste your time keeping up with the Kardashians, have you kept with yourself? You have to stay in tune with your past and present in order to daily remember who you are.

How to Deal with Daily Stress

Have you ever felt so lethargic? You need to ask yourself what is it that you aren't doing that you could be doing. Life is too short to spend it doing what you hate. Don't settle for a boring life...do exciting and new things daily.

The Key to Self-Acceptance

Everything has its time. Your sense of self-worth shouldn't be based on the different things that time brings to you. Learn to accept yourself and love yourself even if you feel like a loser.

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Is Marriage For You?

I came across an article some weeks ago about selflessness in marriage. I was so curious to read it and later realized that it was all about selflessness. The article also made me wonder whether some people are not meant to marry. Could it be because of excessive selfishness or excessive selflessness? Either way you need to have a balance before or after you marry someone or your selflessness might  make you resentful if you have a selfish partner. On the other hand, of course if you are selfish in marriage it won't really make sense because marriage is all about sharing everything.

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

People change

Have you ever thought about how certain people were when you first met them? Yeah you might have had a good or bad first impression about them. The truth is regardless of that, people do and will change. We ourselves also change but just make sure that you change in a good way.

Feeling Unappreciated

Have you ever felt like no one appreciates all that you do? One question to ask yourself is, why do you crave that appreciation? Does it make you feel more human? Why can't you survive without it? Be careful because you should be able to stand strong independent of whether you are appreciated or not.

Sunday, November 3, 2013

The Importance of Critical Analysis

Are you always into seeing the things the way that popular media presents them to you? You have to learn to find some of the hidden truths by yourself. You need to understand multiple perspectives before you even shape your own opinion. Learn to understand why other people see things the way they do.

Saturday, November 2, 2013

Memories from the 90s

Are you a 90s child? Did you grow up watching Fresh Prince of Bel Air, Power Rangers, Family Matters, and more. Oh and did you like Michael Jackson? Oh yeah its already been the end of an era and there will never be a time like the 90s. Don't throw away all your 90s stuff...jot them down or store them because one day they will be gone...An ode to the 90s.

When I Have A Son

When  I have a son, I will him teach that he doesn't  need outside approval in order to be a man,
I will teach him that he doesn't have to be the loudest or fight the most in order to get  respect,
I will teach him that he doesn't have to play with a million girl's heart in order to be a man,
I will teach him that he doesn't have to be emotionless because we are all humans at the end of the day.

                           
                              

When I Have A Daughter

When I have a daughter, I will teach her to love others. I will also teach her to believe in herself to the extent that she doesn't love others because she can't love herself.

When I have a daughter, I will teach her to respect those behind and ahead of her because they can and will influence parts of her.

When I have a daughter, I will teach her to be herself because at the end of the day, that will be the greatest gift she can give to God, herself, and the rest of humanity.

Self-discipline and Procrastination

Some college students think it is cute to say "I procrastinate a lot." Well that would be cute for an infant to say. But as a young adult you are basically just saying that you have no self-discipline to do what you really need to be doing at the right time and place and in the right way. You are basically dissing yourself. Like who would openly say, "I have no self-discipline" and yet millions will say, "I am a procrastinator." And yeah it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy that takes you down as you never live up to your full potential although it may look like you are superficially thriving. So today is your lucky day to kiss your lover Procrastination good bye. Hehehe!

Put Your But Down

People have different ways of getting their messages across. One of the most important lessons, I have learned from some people in my life is, "Put Your But Down." It may sound harsh to some, but isn't prevention better than cure? Oh yes it is that is why we need to make sure that we cultivate self-discipline. We need to discipline ourselves and make sure that we know when to walk around and when to sit down and get important stuff done in the most timely and efficient manner.

Preventing Suicide

Sometimes the people who kill themselves seem to have led the happiest lives. Sometimes there are vivid signs and people know that something is coming. Regardless, it is important for communities to watch out for each other. Don't be superficial. Let's fight suicide by being real with the people around us a day at a time. Sometimes all this means is you have to shut up and let someone else speak more than you. Just do it because you never know that you could be saving a life by shutting your mouth for a second.

Do you Hate Reading Books?

Why do some people love reading books? Why do others hate it? Some of this might be caused by what you have observed. If you have always been surrounded by people who read a million books but did nothing with their lives, you might not be interested in books. On the other hand, if you saw people's lives being changed by books you will likely love to read. Regardless, of your situation, pick up a book and read it. Readers get way ahead in life....yeah you heard me....Readers are leaders, as they say.

The Beauty of Gratitude

Some people say well I will be grateful after I get this or that. Wait a minute. Your inner attitude shouldn't depend on your external circumstances. You need to be thankful and joyful regardless of what is around and that will stay with you through the good times and bad times.

Dealing with Self-rejection

Some of you might think that you are nobodies because of what others have said about you. Some of you are even excellent at dissing yourselves. You have got to stop being your own number one enemy. Try to be your number one cheerleader for a day and experience the change.

Getting to Know Yourself

There is nothing powerful like getting to know yourself. You need to continuously be curious about learning about you...it's called self-awareness. The more you know about yourself, the more you will end up investing your time, energy, and resources in things that fulfill you.

Don't Force Things

Some things are meant to be attained by consistent and targeted effort. Some are not. Don't you sometimes wish that someone could stop you before you made a foolish mistake in the name of "persistency?" It's a good trait to have but we all need balance...let things be as they need to be...don't sweat it or force it.

Blessing others Without Money

It is sometimes hard to know how to give someone something that isn't related to money. Sometimes monetary gifts can be shallow and meaningless. Be creative and find ways to give your time as a gift and leave your money in your pockets until next time.

How to Be there For Others

Michael Jackson once sang, "Will you be there?" This song is so deep. It is from the depths of a human soul. Can you imagine not knowing who is for you or against you in the midst of so much pain and confusion? We sometimes never know until the going gets tough but you can choose to be there for someone today. Just open your eyes and ears and take someone in.

Finding True Friendship

Who is your true friend? Is it your mother, brother, or sister? Sometimes family can be your closest friends and it is okay. At the same time, God can give you people in your life who can stick closer than a relative. Just be open and accept the true friends that God has given you.

Friday, November 1, 2013

One of the Saddest Things

One of the saddest things is the day when you realize that your friends were your enemies. And the ones that you trusted and loved the most want nothing to do with you. It's life....it' s okay because people are in our lives for a season.